Discipline Through Coaching

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An important theme in parenting should be, “never accomplish for your child what he can do for himself.” Teaching your child independence makes the task of discipline much easier. How do we teach our children to take responsibility for their own lives?


An important theme in parenting should be,
“never accomplish for your child what he can do for himself.”  Teaching your child independence makes the
task of discipline much easier.  How do
we teach our children to take responsibility for their own lives?  If you invest the energy now, you will
receive the benefits later from your efforts to teach your children good
habits. 
 
Coaching our children is an important facet
in the process of parenting.  Coaching
children consists of role-modeling and teaching proper ways of behaving.  Often, we assume that our children are aware
and understand what our expectations are for them.  We may feel discouraged if our kids do not
share their toys properly, do not smile and greet people with proper social
skills, or manage their household chores. 
As parents, we become frustrated when our children display behaviors
that demonstrate a lack of concern for others, behave impulsively, or lack
personal independence. 
 
Establishing positive and negative
consequences are important to discipline, but first parents must coach their
youngsters regarding the ways of handling a myriad of social behaviors, helping
them to develop self-confidence and self-directed behavior.  Coaching your children may involve:
 
  • Teaching basic hygiene skills such as showing your child how to
    brush his teeth properly.
  • Coaching your child in the skills necessary to promote playing
    fair with others.
  • Educating your child in the use of proper social manners and
    etiquette. 
  • Coaching your child to respect and value personal property.
  • Teaching your child to be sensitive to the feelings of others.
  • Educating your child to support and assist children who are
    less fortunate.
  • Teaching positive thinking and the development of positive character
    traits. 
  • Educating children to assist the family with household
    chores.  Demonstrate to them how to
    do the chores satisfactorily.  Allow
    for mistakes and re-teach.
 
Appropriate behaviors that children display
must be “caught” and “taught” by their parents. 
Coaching your children in the proper ways of handling behavioral tasks
is imperative.  Without parental
involvement in teaching your children how to manage their behavior, your
discipline plan is a recipe for failure. 
 
James P. Krehbiel is an author,
contributing writer, and cognitive-behavioral therapist practicing in Scottsdale,
Arizona.  His book, Stepping
out of the Bubble:  Reflections on
the Pilgrimage of Counseling Therapy is
available at http://www.booklocker.com/books/2242.html.  He can be reached at www.krehbielcounseling.com.



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